Flatlining Life

I was reading a note from one of the Emerging Futures participants....one that spoke of her sense of excitement and enthusiasm, followed by the well-intentioned efforts of a loved one to encourage her to 'calm down'.

I was immediately transported back to a time in my own life, so very long ago, when my brother and I were having a grand time at the dinner table on Christmas Day. My mother was exhausted from a late night and many guests for a meal that she alone was preparing; my father was feeling no pain from his noon-day buzz; and my mutually-despising paternal grandmother and maternal grandfather had already stiffened into their battle positions before the first 'Pass the gravy, please' had been uttered.

My brother and I were in our own little world, finding something funny in everything and allowing ourselves to feel the full force of a good belly laugh. We weren't even being that loud - we were just being that happy.

My mother repeatedly advised us to stop laughing so hard because we would end up crying. Hmmm....go figure! What was that supposed to mean???? Even though I could not make sense of it at the age of 8, today I am clear that it was not about my or my brother's happyness - it was about her unhappyness. It was not about our glee - it was about her misery and stress.

Today, I wonder....when we are excited and enthusiastic about something, how often are those who encourage us to be 'reasonable' and 'level headed', themselves, still feeling the sting of their own disappointment? How often are we motivated to make someone else's world smaller because we feel so caught in the small world of our own?

I, for one, am unwilling to flatline my life. My life is to be lived - not weighed, measured, labelled and assessed.

Breathing is good.....