Elements of a Catalyst

It’s been a great day!

I had lunch by the water with a woman whose company I thoroughly enjoy. We concluded today that the only way you can really know how you’ll do at the deep end of the pool is to venture in to the deep end of the pool! Until that happens, it’s all philosophy, hearsay, wishing and hope. It‘s all story without wisdom. We concluded that now is as good a time as any to start living large and just dive in!

After great conversation, great company and great food, I headed for home and checked in to see what was new on email. There, I found a note from a woman who shared her admiration and respect for her friend who has become a WEL-Systems Master Facilitator over the last 18 months. As I read, it occurred to me that what makes her so different is that she LIVES what she has learned/discovered. Every conversation, every problem, every person, every email, every choice point is an invitation for her to stand in the ‘now’ and live her life differently. Her way of being is a living model of what it takes to profoundly shape her world. She does not apologize for who she is, what she holds to be true and how she moves through the world.

Most of us live secret lives. There is the one that maps to what we think the world wants/expects of us and then there is the one that lives inside of us. Many times in our day-to-day living, the conversation that goes on inside of us does not match the one that is going on outside of us. Living authentically requires the simple act of decloaking and being true to ourselves, no matter where we are, who we’re with or what we’re doing. Our secrets kill us and keep us locked into living much smaller lives of habituation.

And it’s not an easy thing to do. It takes courage to let the world see the truth of who we are. It takes courage to take our safe and comfortable conversations in small groups of aligned and supportive people out into the much larger, and unpredictable, domain of clients, colleagues, neighbors, partners, parents and offspring. It’s easy to be brave when we’re by ourselves; to be bold when we are preaching to the converted. It’s much harder when there is a chance that there will be disagreement, challenges to our model of the world….and worse, ridicule and embarrassment.

In a recent conversation with a WEL-Systems Catalyst, we concluded that the catalytic properties of a catalyst only find expression when the catalyst is inserted into another context, i.e. a solution or medium. In that moment, the catalyst activates and its medium is transformed by its presence. Likewise, WEL-Systems Catalysts cannot be effective by themselves in a closet! If there is no willingness to enter into organic collectives (i.e. families, work, friends, clients, colleagues, etc.) and engage, there is no catalysis. Plain and simple.

There are a number of definitions for the word ‘catalyst’ with all of them in agreement that a catalyst engages with something else; and that the catalyst precipitates change in that something else, without losing itself.

Back to the young woman and her WEL-Systems Master Facilitator friend…. The difference is the willingness to engage in a decloaked and authentic way as a way of ‘being’ and not as a technique of ‘doing’. She is who she is and she can no longer be otherwise – and it goes with her everywhere in her life. Every conversation. Every person. Every breath, from one day to the next. And that is what makes a difference.

Breathing is good…..

Entrepreneurial Women

It's been a busy day on the outside but a quiet one on the inside. As much as there is always a barrage of emails and phone calls, my inner state is one of quiet watching. What am I watching for? I wonder.....

I feel such longing for....something! Something new and different. Something stunning and outstanding! Something compelling and provocative that punches through the repetitive and the mundane. No matter how brilliant a thought might be, thinking it over and over again; living it every day and feeling caught in its brilliance leaves me flat and lifeless. I can appreciate why people who spend their lives achieving wealth and success are also the ones who end it all. It's never about the destination, it's always about the adventure of the trip.

I'm aware of so much repetition in our world. The details of the story change and yet, it is the same story. Fill in the blanks and nonetheless, the outcome is always the same: stuck in what we know and who we believe ourselves to be.

Today, what emerged into my future is the framework for a new four-day retreat experience with and for entrepreneurial women. We are not like others. The very things that often leave others finding us annoying or unrealistic or pig-headed are at the very core of our capacity to create and manifest what we want.

The capacity to stand alone. The capacity to see what others cannot yet distinguish. The willingness to invest all of who we are into what we do. The desire to have what we do be a reflection of who we are, rather than a collection of tasks that produce a result. The capacity to hold to the dream and allow it to be in flow, even when others have long lost hope. The capacity to pay attention to many things at once - and not let go. The ability to have every experience stand as a marker of our own evolution, no matter what the outcome. These are the things we move toward.

We are drawn to the impossible, the improbable and the unlikely. We look beyond what attracts and seek what lies beneath and holds the attraction in place. We think and move in leaps and bounds; move through things in chunks; and when the dust settles, look back to notice how we did it. As much as we often find ourselves doing it, waiting for others is not what we do best. And yet, without a capacity for inclusion, what's the point of it all?

Emerging Futures: Entrepreneurial Women is coming. It is forming itself, even as I write this. From claiming the truth of my own experience, I know that it will nourish, replenish, provoke....it will invite and allow....and it will welcome my unrest and that of others as it takes on a life of its own. Those are the best moments! The ones that begin to rise out of seeming banality and become a wave that takes us all to new shores, new ideas, new ways of engaging. And it happens in the blink of an eye. And to think that it all started because someone noticed the way the light was hitting the water....

I, for one, am ready for much more, much faster. I'm ready for that next great leap of expanding and acceleration; that next expression/conversation that will be welcoming. And 'welcoming' seems to be a very important aspect of this process. Nothing to brace against; nothing to prove; no races, competitions, challenges; no winners or losers. Rather, the Space to relax, consider, ponder, explore....all with eyes wide open and expectations big enough for a much larger life to flow into. In these moments, none of the rules apply.

It will happen sooner rather than later.

Breathing is good.....

Quickening

Today, in every conversation and email, I could feel the quickening. The effects of last week's Emerging Futures: Leadership Redefined - Reclaimed continues to reverberate through all that I think and say and do. It is as if I am vibrating at a different frequency.

When I read Anne's post on her blog re 'Redefining Education', I got goose bumps. My goose bumps never lie! When they move, I know that I've touched something (an idea, a person, a random thought, etc) that is very potent for the future to emerge differently.

Any nominalization in our language can be redefined. Success. Love. Parenting. Work. It doesn't matter what it is, recognizing that nominalizations are nothing more than code words for habituated ways of thinking and being, redefining them is a great place to start! I wonder what my life might become if I were to pick one a day - one that I hold as important and/or 'fact' - and just consider how else I might 'define' that for myself; and how those who move through their world differently, define it for themselves. Kind of like blowing the cob webs out of the attic.

This just popped to mind (and I wonder how they're related since I know they have to be or they would not have connected): the notion that history is irrelevant for creating the future. History is not intended to be a guide to the future - it's intended to be digested so that we might become 'more' as a result of it. Discover more about ourselves so that we need not hang on to how we've been. That was really driven home tonight while my mother and I watched the CBC DVD on the re dedication of the monument at Vimy Ridge.

Perhaps war and our experience of those who fight them is the greatest challenge for us to move beyond who we have been. As I watch and listen, I experience a deep and genuine grief, and sadness and profound gratitude and appreciation for all those whose courage and sacrifice have made it possible for me to live the life I live today. My father was on the beaches at Normandy on D-Day plus 1 - wading through bodies - and was never the same again. He went there a boy and came back stunned by his experience.

And yet, even as the tears flow down my cheeks, I know deep in my being that this is insane! In our grief and appreciation, we build monumental myths about the valor of war. There is no valor in war - there is only death, destruction and the devastation of the human mind and spirit.

Who would we be without our willingness to kill? Who would we become without our myths and mythos of warrior cultures...brave and strong and true...ready to take a life and lay down their own for the cause. As I watched the Vimy Ridge documentary, all I could see were thousands of men in the ancient garb of European peasants, whacking at each other, brutalizing each other....and for what! We're still at it....and not much has changed.

Perhaps 'war' is a nominalization that we need to redefine. Like there was a time when it was 'kool' to drink and drive, all of which has been redefined in our cultural psyche - maybe 'war' is not kool anymore and we need to reconsider what the real consequence of it is.

It's been a long day...and a great day....

And breathing is good....

The Next Wave

If, as the fabric from which the WEL-Systems material emerged, I am the first wave, then those who discovered from me would be the second; and those who discovered from them would be the third. During the last few days, I became greatly awakened to what has been birthed. The Third Wave is moving much faster and further than the first two and has already birthed a fourth that I know of...and likely more!

Life is never neat and tidy and predictable. As I consider this, I am mindful of the degree to which I have been aware of water - BIG WATER! - over the last two years. If I live in a holographic universe (which I believe I do) then it may well be that the big water I am mindful of is not at the Environment level but much higher up levels of thinking. It may be the deepening and accelerating waves of a shifting world view, one that is highly contagious and one that is showing itself to have become highly contagious. That Third Wave is moving fast....

As I listened and watched these women in this Third Wave, I was so aware of how they spent little if any time at all looking back and trying to understand and figure stuff out, and so much more of them focused on where they are going. Good advice for us all to consider! They are shameless in their willingness to engage and be seen to be engaging! They are shameless in coming face-to-face with their fear, declaring it to be so - and getting on with it! They spend very little time and effort considering what others will think; worrying about whether they're going to look foolish or sound weird. They're far too busy engaging!

As I consider this Third Wave and what is being created, I find myself feeling uplifted and carried ever further into my own journey! I am delighted by this combination of Fire and Water - and things sizzle!

Breathing is good....

Flatlining Life

I was reading a note from one of the Emerging Futures participants....one that spoke of her sense of excitement and enthusiasm, followed by the well-intentioned efforts of a loved one to encourage her to 'calm down'.

I was immediately transported back to a time in my own life, so very long ago, when my brother and I were having a grand time at the dinner table on Christmas Day. My mother was exhausted from a late night and many guests for a meal that she alone was preparing; my father was feeling no pain from his noon-day buzz; and my mutually-despising paternal grandmother and maternal grandfather had already stiffened into their battle positions before the first 'Pass the gravy, please' had been uttered.

My brother and I were in our own little world, finding something funny in everything and allowing ourselves to feel the full force of a good belly laugh. We weren't even being that loud - we were just being that happy.

My mother repeatedly advised us to stop laughing so hard because we would end up crying. Hmmm....go figure! What was that supposed to mean???? Even though I could not make sense of it at the age of 8, today I am clear that it was not about my or my brother's happyness - it was about her unhappyness. It was not about our glee - it was about her misery and stress.

Today, I wonder....when we are excited and enthusiastic about something, how often are those who encourage us to be 'reasonable' and 'level headed', themselves, still feeling the sting of their own disappointment? How often are we motivated to make someone else's world smaller because we feel so caught in the small world of our own?

I, for one, am unwilling to flatline my life. My life is to be lived - not weighed, measured, labelled and assessed.

Breathing is good.....

Afterthought....

I realize that I am no longer seeking. In this and every moment, I am mindful of fully living what unfolds in me - from one breath to the next. And THAT is what keeps my heart beating.

Breathing is good.....

New dawn - new day

I woke up this morning with such a sense of the dawning of a new day. As if, from a fresh start, anything is possible for me to be....to do...to create.

From that place, I made my way to my computer and checked out the WEL-Systems Blogging Community links to see what the folks are up to today - and I found Anne's blog. I felt such joy to read of her discovery of herself; of her vision and potential and to feel her joy at this huge sense of awakening. In the moment of her discovery, I know a pulse went through the field as evidence of her awakening. In my world, this is the pulse that is essential to creating a new world.

I think of Anne and in that thought, I know that we are all 'Anne' in our own way. We are so much more than we have been taught to believe we are....and that we have been taught to believe we can become. Our presence is so HUGE - and yet, our intentions are often whittled down to a sliver of what we might be...do...create. In this moment, Anne is unwilling to be less that who she is.

And who she is IS the Sun! It flows through her and from her and shapes all that she creates and experiences. When she allows herself to be so bold as to claim that for herself, her world - and all that who step into it - will be touched by the Sun that she is...and their lives will change.

Each of us IS that signal - that unique expression of the essence of our being in this world. When we can find that, and claim that for ourselves, we are unstoppable in manifesting what we desire. And that's not about more money, a better job, a faster car or a bigger house! It's about manifesting a world of abundance in which none of those is any longer relevant.

In the puzzle that is the universe, each of us is a unique piece. Without the expression of that piece that we are, the puzzle is never complete. EAch of us is essential to the whole - and when we do not show up, there is an empty space that waits...and waits...for us to show up.

Amy, Lori, Pat, Lucy, Carole, MaDonna, Anne, me, you.....we are not the sum total of our accomplishments. We are the conduit for our magnificence - if we allow it to be in flow. That means that we have to get past what was, stand in the 'now' of mindful awareness and step boldly and without apology into the future! Our futures are not planned or strategized - they just EMERGE from the strength of our connection to ourselves, and from there, manifest a new and different and life-sustaining world.

As much as we were together, we each know that it demands standing alone. Being willing to get over ourselves and our habits of self-denegration and self-deprecation to stand in the full measure of who we are. Whatever that may be. From there, all is possible.

Women are the key. Not because women are more than men but because women are profoundly restless in the coma of their deep sleep. Agitation is an invitation to engage!

Breathing is good.....

Emerging from women and leadership

Wow! I can't believe how fast that went! Seems like I just got to Oceanstone and before I knew it, I was at the airport in Halifax, waiting for my flight home.

Not a moment dragged. Not a conversation took place that was not full of discovery, potential, insights and ideas. Every woman who participated left this new Emerging Futures and Women: Leadership Redefined - Reclaimed experience - including me! - in awe of the majesty of who they are and who they can become. I'll look forward to their own words when they offer up what it was for them to engage this process.

There were many moments of intense emotional expression. Lots of tears and lots of laughs. Our day had a leisurely start, a rich and compelling middle, and an easy end of conversation among friends. It was very clear to me that we are far more connected and creative when we are relaxed and in flow with the physical and human environment around us. No doubt, anyone watching us would have seen nothing other than a group of women in animated conversation, clearly enjoying each other's company. Little would they know we were in the process of shaping our worlds.

Conscious choosing. Choosing to stand in the 'now' and move forward. Choosing to notice the fear and relax into it rather than pressing it away. Choosing to allow a new thought, or a new behaviour, and engage rather than allowing cynicism to dismiss the potential. Choosing to risk and say what was present. Choosing to say out loud the conversation that was in flow in the privacy of their own mind. And every single one of these choices made it possible for all of us - each in our own way - to grow and awaken to so much more of our own potential.

It was interesting to me to note how goals expanded into visions; how plans relaxed into intentions; and how small and predictable became the platform to imagine the unimaginable! "Who, ME????? I can do THAT??????"

We determined that 'leadership' was a word/nominalization that was too small for what was possible for us all. So, 'leadership' became a word that reflected a result or an outcome, with far more powerful words like 'creator' and 'manifestor' evoking much greater potential. Standing in the NOW and choosing to move forward into that which does not yet exist. So much of 'leadership' and all that of its associations are tied to the past. Our attention was turned away from the past, grounded in the present and unfolded into the future.

Perhaps one of the greatest moments was in the discovery that there is nothing to fight against; nothing to break down or tear apart. As we withdraw our energy/focus/attention from what 'is' and redirect to what we choose, we create what we desire. Without the power of our attention to sustain it, what 'is' collapses.

I've been working with a WEL-Systems perspective for a very long time. What I discovered from these few days is that as powerful as it has all been, this process of Evolution by Intention and Emerging Futures accelerates it all. And as exciting as this is for me, I am also very clear: there is more. Every idea - no matter what it is - will always have a higher order context within which it rests. Right now, the body of knowledge of WEL-Systems sits in the higher order context of Evolution by Intention, which sits in the higher order context of Emerging Futures. And I know that there is a higher order context for Emerging Furtures - and I'm in the search.

Life is magical!

Breathing is good.....

Choosing to trust

The end of our first full day and we are all different. More awake. More open. More curious. And perhaps most important, more willing to engage - whether we know how to or not.

As we went through the day and I listened to these women discover their dreams and share their lives, I found myself wondering what the essential element for accelerated evolution was/is. Courage? Determination? Curiosity? As much as these made sense to me, I was mindful that without the simple act of choosing - the act of declaration that it is so - those other experiences are not sufficient in and of themselves to change the course of a life from one being lived to one worth living.

Choosing. Declaring. The act of making visible what far too often remains hidden inside us. The act of choosing/declaring reveals to the world the intention that we carry in the privacy of our own minds. Once we choose, the choice itself becomes the marker for the road we travel.

An Emerging Future demands that we trust the sensory cues in our own body. Doing that is a choice - and nothing more. It may well be THE one that profoundly changes the quality of our lives.

Breathing is good....

Doors opening - thoughts flowing

Our first conversation took us long into the night. It's almost 1:00 a.m. and I am wide awake and ready for more!

Those who have gathered here are ready, willing and up to the task. It is not by accident that they have gathered; and it is by design that each will be a critical part in my own evolution...in the appearance of the next wave.

Oceanstone fills the senses and in so doing, awakens the body. Since an Emerging Future cannot be 'known' in the intellect, and only exists in the body, our senses are a crucial component of exploring how to live as an expression of that Emerging Future. 'Sensing' our way through from the 'now' to what can be...allowing 'instinct' to lead the way.... these are the skills to engage and hone. We have relied on the intellect for far too long, and it has gotten us what we have. Methinks we're long overdue for a change....

Each of the women here is deeply and intricately connected to the other. Even if how, exactly, is not yet clear, the truth of it has already begun to surface in the things we talk about. It makes me wonder: where else in my life are these connections already present and I am not noticing them? How else might I engage with others beyond that which is familiar to me; and if so, what might I discover about myself?

Perhaps the most pressing awareness for me today is the degree to which women manifest incrementally; the degree to which caution is required to ensure that we do not look 'foolish' or 'fool hardy' in our thoughts and/or intentions; the degree to which we edit what moves inside us before we make it available outside of us, sure that if offered in its immensity, it will be dismissed, ridiculed or disregarded.

Tomorrow begins another conversation - and I wonder where it will lead.

It has been a good day! It's late...I'm tired....and

Breathing is good.....

Anticipation and excitement

Things are stirring as I get ready to spend my week in conversation with women, about women and leadership. Leadership redefined - leadership reclaimed.

I have no idea what to expect - and isn't that the point of an emerging future! I'm very ready for this; am very willing to step into it; and am very able to engage it all. Those who will be with me bring very unique and 'unpractised' lives. They do now 'know' from the outside but know deeply from the inside. This week, we will all discover what we know.

The days are always so full. The conversations are rich and potent; thick and juicy with potential. My intention is to write at the end of every day, that I might capture more of the threads of the tapestry as it is weaving itself. I know that I will surprise even myself with what I am drawn to pay attention to. This week will reveal itself to me in ways that I know will open my eyes to the 'more' that awaits.

For now, it's time to pack......

Breathing is good.....

Leadership and manifestation

I'm in Quebec City for a few days, hanging out with my mother and shopping. I had no idea she could move that fast. It would seem that to her, the sound of doors opening at 9:00 a.m. is akin to that of a starter pistol.

Although it's only been three days, I feel somehow rekindled and ready for more! Who would have thought that treking through shopping centers would be the space I needed to allow new thoughts to flow. Me...who hates shopping! Somewhere between the last t-shirt and the red leather travel bag, it occurred to me that, in some way, this is the enlargening (is that a word???) space into which next week will flow. And all I've done is play.

Next week, I am at Oceanstone for a small gathering of women to explore what redefining and reclaiming 'leadership' might look and sound like. These women have been drawn to this small collective from an unspoken yet shared personal experience of knowing that their lives do not match the immensity of their presence, their intention and their longing for more. Each unique and talented in her own way (and aren't we all!), I enter into an exploration with them fully aware that I have no idea where it will end up; no idea what conclusions we may come to. And yet, what I am also very aware of is that the discovery is there for us to step into and wear as how we choose to live.

Like January 2006 saw an awakening of a pressure for me to engage, so does this coming week offer that same kind of pressure to engage....a pressure to step outside the traditional conversation about the good ship 'leader-ship' and consider the implications of all the barnacles that have come to attach themselves over time and distance travelled; of the impact of having sailed the same waters far too many times and forgotten or overlooked what it is to be in the vast unexplored and undiscovered. We think we know what leadership is. I believe that we know what it is, relative to what we think we are. However, as the new biology redefines what we are, have we stopped to consider the implications of this new knowledge relative to our capacity to manifest? And what is leadership if not a capacity to manifest!

This week has been filled with fun and play. Next week will be filled with fun and play of a different kind...of a higher order of impact and potential. Perhaps next week's conversation will take us beyond noticing that the Emperor has no clothes and create the space for us to shop for new ones!

Breathing is good......

Before healing comes awakening

For days, now, this phrase has been going through my mind: "Before healing comes awakening". Over and over again, this same thought repeating itself, obviously intent on staying in my awareness until I do something with it!

Today is the day.

It makes sense to me. What it says to me is that dis-ease or illness is an indication of a being in a deep sleep or, more in alignment with what I believe is occurring today, a coma. Dis-ease is the way that the Signal that we are lets us know where we are asleep, how we have gone to sleep and what we need to pay attention to in order to awaken.

What it also says to me is that health/wellness, vitality and life force are present when we are awake to the truth of who we are and our own potential.

Dis-ease = asleep/coma. Wellness = awake! Simple.

Take breast cancer, as an example. An indication of sleep in the area of culturally conditioned self (heart centre – 4th chakra). What it says to me is that the ‘sick’ person has gone into a deep sleep in the area of culturally conditioned self, allowing what others think and believe and say; what others expect and demand; and what others will or won’t do as being more important – more relevant and more powerful in guiding the choices made – than the sleeping being herself.

I then get curious about how did she get that way and what does she need to do to wake up? The trajectory of the dis-ease, meaning how it developed from its first manifestations of sensations in the body, to its current expression help me to pay attention to how they went to sleep. This is important because it can also help me figure out how they can wake up. And if indeed, awake = well, then awake is what we’re looking for!

The CODE Model is my framework for exploring that trajectory of awake to sleep/coma and back again.

In this moment, it is so clear to me. When I think back to all the people I’ve worked with, it has all been there.

When my hand goes to sleep, it tells me that I am restricting something in some way. I did something in a certain way that led to the natural result of my hand ‘going to sleep’. If I do something else instead, my hand will wake up. Why should it be any different with cancer? Or Crohn’s? Or brain tumors?

I wonder if we’re ready – as a species – to recognize that we create it all. The hand going to sleep and the brain tumor. It’s all part of the same process. Perhaps if we could ‘get’ that, we’d all be healthier, much faster.

Breathing is good….

Incomplete/not-yet-completely-cooked thoughts

It is one of those days when my outside clock tells me that it’s been a long day and I need to sleep but my inside clock tells me that it’s time to write. I look around me and still see the movement of others in the house, and out on the street below and yet, inside – where I live – I am feeling pulled into that dense, timeless fog that is one of the gifts that comes from being awake at 3:00 a.m.

I love that time of day and I love that sense of being in a world far removed from the one my body occupies. Totally separate and alone and yet in some way connected to everything. Every breath feels like wispy tentacles of air reaching through the ether to connect. Every thought feels like it streams behind it and from it, at least a million more, none of which require detail or content but are full and rich and complete by virtue of their very existence.

Things flow, without the need for direction or intention, carried on an inner vibration that grows and expands and…what’s the word…emanates from my being. Like the sound a whisper makes when it’s heard. What we notice is the whisper… the sensation in the body that the whisper awakens…and forget all about the content. The sound of the whisper IS the content that is most meaningful!

I wonder why we think we need to know. The best nano-seconds of my life have unfolded with huge ramifications when I did not have a clue. I did not know; I did not seek to know; and knowing or not knowing never entered my awareness. The result was a rush of genius through the body – all without any particular content and yet racing with images and sounds and sensations in my body, capturing thousands of ideas in a single heartbeat - knowing deeply without having to know what I knew. I just knew.

In this moment, things are moving faster than my willingness or ability to attempt to capture them. In this moment, I wonder if my body knows that it is not yet 3:00 a.m. and is somehow holding back. What might that be, I wonder……

And so, I wait. I occupy my thoughts and my fingers by allowing what is there to fall out the ends of my fingers and make way for the ‘more’ that is close behind. I wander across the keyboard, restless and unable to settle, and yet clear in the recognition that what awaits has not yet completed gestation. When the moment presents, the next layer will birth itself. Nothing for me to do but wait….

It’s not what I do best. Waiting. There is a passive quality to it and yet, this waiting feels different. It’s not passive – it’s more like the deep inhale before the sigh is released. Can you have one without the other?

Breathing is good….

Work-in-progress

I am a work-in-progress….perhaps more now than ever before. Even I am surprised by what flows in and out of my thoughts, and the degree to which I am different from one day to the next.

I am surprised by my own impatience – eager to get on with it!

I am excited by my sense of what the future holds – for me and for others.

I am sometimes fearful – and most times, hopeful – of the powerful beings that we are and what we might create.

I am drawn to meaning, seeking it in all things, all places, all people; in all conversations and experiences; watching and listening for it in every seemingly random act I engage in.

In all things, my future emerges. The question is never whether or not it’s present. The question always is: am I paying attention sufficiently to notice? It does not pass me by. When I choose to look away to what is more familiar to me, it does not leave me. It finds another way to slide into my awareness – invitation to choose again.

The big changes in my life are already in flow, long put in motion and with intended outcomes now peeking out from behind the effects of my own long-held habits.

That restlessness has been growing for more than a year. Begun in January 2006 (having awakened one morning to find it just sitting there… vibrating… somewhere in my chest) and followed by so many new discoveries, the lull of the past few months is giving way to the urge to engage. I can tell what to pursue and what to let go of by the vibration in my own body. When it is there, it is a signal to me to engage. When it is nowhere to be sensed, it is my signal to let go and move on. Even in its absence, its message is unquestionable.

I’m not used to that… to the notion of unquestionable. There is nothing in my life that I don’t question. And yet, for whatever reason, I am clear that the ‘me’ that I am in this physical world trusts easily and completely the ‘ME’ that is calling to my attention.

In the near future, it will be time for me to write of Evolution by Intention and Emerging Futures and how they are connected. They are the front and back of the same hand. When I am willing to relax into one, the other simply becomes. There is no effort. There is no struggle. And, as Yoda would say, there is no ‘try’ – there is only ‘do or not do’. I choose to do.

I feel others around me waking up. My life has been fed by my desire to share with others the process of awakening. It has never been my interest or intention to impose what it is that they awaken to. That is the domain of the single soul and its expression in this world. And I am clear that I know well the process of awakening. So many talk of it and long for it and yet, never find it. So many talk of awakening while they stumble around in the dark. Today, in conversation with a colleague and friend, I was again reminded of the distinction between conversations about awakening, and the experience of being awake. They are not the same.

And so, one more day goes by and I find myself more present than the last. Today, in conversation with the Mauna Lani, it struck me: this is real! On the holodeck of my experience, April will be felt through Huna in Hawaii. Wow…and this is my life. Who would have thought?

Breathing is good…..