I had a dream....

…and in that dream, I experienced an event that was stunning and deeply painful to me. In that same dream, someone I trust was telling me that I did not see what I saw, hear what I heard….and I did not know what I know. I awakened from that dream, startled by the sense of its reality; and feeling pressure in my head and in my chest.

Even as I pondered the dream itself, I wondered: had I really dreamed that? The vivid and raw nature of it lingered in my body and left me knowing, unequivocally, that I had indeed.

Through the day, the dream wafted through my awareness, like stale cigarette smoke escaping through the opening lobby doors, long after the smokers have left. And like stale cigarette smoke, it left a bad taste in my mouth. Throughout the day, it pulled at my consciousness, nudging me toward a discovery that did not come easily to me. Strange as it may seem and as obvious as it may be to you, it took all day for me to get it!

All this occurring on the heels of an amazing experience with 13 courageously curious women in “Igniting the Self” and ‘Resourcefulness in Action’ at Oceanstone, in Nova Scotia. During that 7-day adventure, I found myself wondering how far I could go in these conversations. To what degree could I trust the truth of what felt right to me, rather than the truth of what I thought would feel right for them?

Of course! That’s what the dream was about! No matter what the issue/event/moment offers up, all there is for me to do is trust the truth of my own experience – no matter how painful, no matter how difficult and no matter how determinedly others (including those I love and trust) may encourage me to do otherwise. It is in trusting the truth of my own experience that my future will emerge, offering me the journey of this lifetime to discover more of the godforce that I already am.

Trusting the truth of my experience will take me down one path. Trusting someone else’s truth will take me down a very different path. On the first, my own potential will emerge. On the other, an adventure of discovery in how NOT to be mySelf will emerge. Either one will allow me to grow and become more – and the first path will, I believe, be the direct route.

The next 18 to 24 months of my own Evolution by Intention will be guided by a mindfulness to engage life in ways that accelerate my own evolution. In doing so, I trust that the holodeck of my experience will offer up good moments and bad; easy discoveries and others that will bring deep and powerful waves that will redesign the very tissue of my being, and all of it will be about finding the ‘more’ that I am.

Emerging Futures don’t come in single file or one at a time. They show up in clusters, like a bouquet of beautiful peach-colored roses wrapped in cellophane and tied with a satin ribbon… a burst of possibilities, inviting us to select one and get to know it intimately – thorns and all. Are we willing to draw one from the pack, allow ourselves to breathe in its scent, risking being caught off guard by the pain such a small thorn can create? Or will we just put them in a vase and observe them from a distance, admiring their beauty but not getting close enough to be disappointed or hurt?

I am grateful for my dream. I am grateful to have people in my life that I love and who love me. And I am also grateful to know that as I evolve with intention, my emerging futures may not always feel good, or feel easy, or match the truth of others AND I can trust that they will be there waiting for me. All I have to do is choose from the truth of what is real for me – and let the chips fall where they may.

Breathing is good…..